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Feb. 13th, 2010

Things are a-happening people. I'm not sure if they're all good things, and I can almost guarantee that they're not exciting or interesting in any way, but that's not important.

I'm moving to my dad's house. Pregnant 15 year old sister = bye Fern.
I might have failed to mention the preggo issue until just this second, so just pretend you know what's going on.
So for the next week, I'm a painter and decorator... I'll let you know how that pans out... possible career in the making? I doubt it somehow...
Literally 1 day into the project and I'm already rediculously tired, which is shocking, considering there wasn't a lot of manual labour on the agenda today. I must just be unfit and lazy.

My Nintedo DS broke today and I don't think I could be more distressed about an electronic device. I'm GUTTED!
The touch screen is completely not working, and I don't think it can be fixed. I swear to god, I was close to tears earlier on. That's how pathetic I really am...
I love that thing though.
So now I'm going to have to buy a new one...
Yeah I'm unemployed but TECHNICALLY I do have money in the bank, I just don't want to spend it, just in case.
But worst case scenario... not having a job in another 3 months time, I'd really like to be able to spend some of my long, dull days helping Professor Layton with puzzles. And lets face it, Mario and Sonic at the Olympics/Winter Olympics is the closest I get to participating in sport, so not having that would be a detriment to my well being...
I've successfully talked myself into parting with £129.99 to buy a new one.
A DSi.
Yeah, the camera might not have any purpose but it's a DS with a camera, so for novelty value, it's a must.
I'm a sucker for useless crap!

I had forgotten how much a hair cut could make you feel good about yourself.
I had mine done today, love it!
I'd post a photo, but I haven't taken any yet, so to make up for it, and because I like to be vain sometimes, I'm going to post one I took a few days ago.

If you didn't already know, I'm actually a ghost. That's why my skin is transparent!



Feb. 12th, 2010

You take my breath away and it breaks my heart that you'll never know. 

I'm lonely tonight, it's just hit me... all of a sudden.
I blame the whole Valentines Day sham... I don't buy into it, but secretly I'm a little bit sad to be on my own another year.
Where's my Princess Charming?



TV Quiz

Since I haven't done one in such a long time...

Pick your five favorite TV shows (in no particular order) and answer the following questions. Don't cheat!

1. Will and Grace
3. One Tree Hill
4. Gilmore Girls
5. Sex and The City
Questions and Answers ...Collapse )



This was intended to be a motivational entry for myself, to make me wake up and realise what I'm going to do next.
Next meaning with the rest of my life.
Or even for the rest of the year.
Or even for however long it takes for me to find my passion.
But I honestly don't know.
I need direction.
I need something to fill my time.
I need a job.
I  need a life.
But I have no idea how to accomplish even one of these things.
I honestly think my fire is burning out. Maybe I'm wasting it. Maybe I want this.
But I know I don't.
I don't want to be the girl who's an empty shell, who lets life pass her by, who lets friends desert her, who doesn't care.
But I fear I'm allowing this to happen, that I don't have the drive to pull through.
My friends are away at uni/away doing things that I'm no longer a part of.
The people I used to call friends are more like 'people I used to know'.
Sometimes I blame myself, but friendship is a two way street, and maybe it was a street that one or both parties couldn't be bothered to travel anymore. Or maybe I wanted to travel the street but they didn't.
I don't know anymore.
Essentially, the people I used to hold close to me have drifted away, and I'm not sure if I'm even bothered.
Of course I'm bothered.
Yet why do I do nothing to sort things out?
To reach out, to catch up, to make things how they used to be.
I wish things could be how they used to be.
I'd have a job, any job.
I'd see my friends.
I'd have fun.
I'd actually live, instead of just existing.
I need drive.
The drive I used to have.
I've only been unemployed for 3 months, but it seems like a lifetime.
It seems like a lifetime of applying for jobs and hearing nothing back.
Of feeling hopeless, and wondering what it is about me that an employer wouldn't want.
I work hard, I'm friendly, and despite how I used to be, I try to get along with everyone. I do everything as best I can.
Or at least I used to.
Maybe I'm not like that anymore.
Maybe I've been worn down in these 3 months.
Maybe it shows.


Jan. 18th, 2010

I've been neglecting you, AGAIN.
In my defence, I've been here, lurking, but not posting.
I can't say I've had anything to post about, my life is increasingly dull these days!
Nothing new there eh?
Fill me in on the gossip :)


I forgot to say Happy New Year to you guys.
I love and miss all of you, sorry to be so neglectful.
I'll be back with a vengance, I promise, starting from now.


Dec. 25th, 2009

Merry Christmas you lovely people!
Hope Santa brought you everything you wanted.


I'm in a serious bad mood these days.
I could go for getting drunk and groping/being groped by a strange lady.
Any takers?


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